Family-friendly

Toronto has an impressive number of "family-friendly" or "kid-friendly" activities. This is great unless:
a) you're not a kid
b) you don't have a kid
c) both of the above.

Being that I belong in the c) category, this family-friendliness is getting on my nerves. Barbecues have more kids than hot dogs, the island ferry has more strollers than life vests and sidewalks everywhere are crawling with little people. There are more kids here than in Brangelina's house, which is just wrong.

Little people seem to be running this city. Everything here is for them. Every activity, fair, show, concert and parade is full of family-friendly, aka boring activities.

For once, I'd like to see a poster for some event that say things like "Not family-friendly, "Please do not bring children" and "No families allowed." I don't want no face painting, animal petting, balloon making or anything with the following words/phrases: "splashing," "loads of fun" and "buckets of fun."

I want some family unfriendly, R-rated fun.